Fat and Sunburned

I know the title is not very nice about myself, but I've learned that the truth hurts. Just like seeing pictures of myself from this weekend at my parents lake house with the kids!! WOW! I knew that I am overweight but for real? How did I get this way?? I understand how I have stayed this way...but how did I get THIS way?

So I hadn't posted in a few days because I was first getting ready for my trip to MO with just me and the kids and then I was in MO until late last night when we finally made it home. I had NO intentions of starting my diet until after getting back from vacation because I knew it would be a horrible trip if I was just starting a new health craze, so instead I went through an eating frenzy. I know, totally unhealthy and gross, but my mom made enough food to feed us all for a week, and no one rarely cooks different and yummy foods for me, so I took advantage. I ate, then ate some more, then even when my stomach was full and stretched to the max I ate some more. I drank a little wine and enjoyed myself. Glutenous. Terrible, I know. However I looked at pictures of me with the kids and almost cried at myself. I am my own worst enemy. I so want to crop myself out of the pictures with the kids, but it's pictures of me helping the boys learn how to fish and cook hot dogs over a fire and put Tess in the pool for the first time. So they are all memorable moments, so it'd be sad for me to not be there. So I will stay in the pictures and they will be a reminder that I cannot look this way again.

I got back home last night and wrote in my food journal my goals for today which were very simple....eat less, skip the junk, try and keep track of my weight watchers points and drink less caffeine free diet coke (which is a staple in my current diet). So far so good. I'm proud of myself today. I thought because I ate so much this weekend that I would be hungrier today, but I think the pictures of me are branded onto my brain and I am embarrassed at how I look.

Today I have enjoyed foods such as a small slice of home made banana bread for breakfast and a fat free blueberry yogurt. For lunch I had a turkey sandwich on whole wheat flat bread with some veggies and that's it for the day so far. If any of you have any really good low fat recipes for meals for the family that even Tony would eat I'd love to try them!!

Beyond the fat part and the glutenous weekend, I had a fabulous time! We spent a great deal of time on my dad's boat, fishing, or riding around, sipping wine, cooking hotdogs over the fire, making smores with the kids, watching fireworks. I missed Tony, but still had a great time. I felt good about being able to do a trip with four kiddos too. That was a super ego boost. The kids had a ton of fun too. None of us got sunburned until our last day there when we just jumped on the boat for about an hour. I lathered up the kids in sunscreen and my arms and some of my face but missed my chest and neck and now have a HUGE red sunburn there. Oh well. It's evidence that I had fun in the sun!

So start your cheering. I need all the encouragement I can get! Today is the official start of my diet and I NEED to do well. I WANT to do well and I want to be a skinnier, healthier me.